Recently I've been plagued by feelings of self loathing, so much so that I was unable to see anything but the dark cloud over my head. After some time considering my options and taking things one step at a time the cloud overhead seems to have dissipated a bit. It's interesting how what I was going through seemed to affect me physically. I was not able to feel the warmth of the sun, even as it was an exceptionally beautiful day. Thinking back everything looked as if it was a few shades darker than it should have been. Though I'm not out of the woods with my problems the small chip I have dealt to it has been a huge moral boost for me. I know that in the near future I will have bouts of sadness and depression, but I will remember this day and how I feel. My sadness concerning my situation, while not long rocked me to my core. I fear what might have happened if I had little more pressure and a little less strength. Through my short experience on this world it's seems that karma, or God, whatever your belief at times you until the very brink to test you. It's up to you to either choose to give up or find the strength inside to push on. From this I gain experience to know what I can handle and what I must stay avoid.